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Here’s What You’ve Missed!
- So long, and thanks for all the fish
- How soon is now?
- The Kung Fu Panda principle.
- 3 reasons why I hate pretty graphs
- How to make the world seem REEAAALLLY BOORRRIIIING
- The 2,500 year old lesson everybody ignores cos it’s too hard
- I am a police officer.
- When is a team meeting NOT a team meeting?
- Folk management
- Double Trouble
- WANTED: systemsy stuff to cheer me up
- The secret management model that must not be named
- Why WIFFY’s are bad and to be squashed at birth
- First they came for the desks, and nobody said NUFFINK
- Vanity of vanities, all is vanity OR Why webstats don’t exist
- One more time… Why values are a pile of cobbler’s
- How i learned to skip with Toyota
- The man who mistook his wife for an actual change in performance
- There are only 6 graphs you’ll ever see on a performance report and they’re all rubbish. Here they are.
- If it’s too complicated to understand it’s probably total nonsense
- Can you count up to 8?
- I am totally positive
- I am totally negative
- Thor describes my purpose
- I openly mock Myers Briggs, but an INTP would do
- The Law Of The Instrument
- Reality has a liberal bias
- Why killing Sweat Angels is the most valuable work I do all day
- Cloud cuckoo-land
- Dear Santa, All I want for Christmas is a pony
- One weird trick to design your organisation, in one easy step! (Management consultants will HATE you!)
- The Varieties of Human Work
- There really is only one test!
- The Curious Case Of The Chart That Didn’t Bark In The Night
- Looking good, Billy Ray!
- Computers are weird
- We’re number 2! We’re number 2! Yay us! Now who’s US exactly?
- I am an average employee
- How to be hopelessly untrendy
- Why you SHOULDN’T try to improve performance measures!
- The sun is in Uranus
- Lean, ISO and 6 Sigma all walk into a bar. Hilarity ensues.
- Three Reasons Why National Customer Service Week Is Rubbish! Again!
- What’s the purpose of a-SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY!
- How to have an organisational detox!
- Your job is not what you think it is
- This mug cost £224,000,000
- Wanted: idle, indifferent and irresponsible staff for absurd work.
- You are no Daniel Kahneman, sir, and I would have you unhand me before I call the gendarmie
- all wrong change clarity of purpose command and control communication customer data deming experiment human brains are weird information knowledge leadership learning me doing it plans plausible but untrue psychology public sector purpose questions statistics systems thinking systems thinking in housing benefits systemz comix targets thinking Uncategorized vanguard method very short posts
- 95% system 5% individual
- all wrong
- ashbys law
- Call centres
- chris argyris
- clarity of purpose
- cognitive bias
- Command and control
- command and control thinking
- control charts
- customer service
- daniel kahneman
- defensive culture
- don't let the bastards grind you down
- double loop learning
- failure demand
- get knowledge
- John Seddon
- kittens are evil
- lean thinking
- local authority
- made to stick
- nassim taleb
- performance management
- performance reports
- policy officer
- public sector
- Seth Godin
- signal and noise
- single loop learning
- some people hate systems thinking
- systems thinking
- systems thinking fundamentals
- systemz comix
- thinking not tools
- thinking system performance
- Vanguard method
- Very short posts
- Zombie Deming
Tag Archives: Data
How to be bored Take a performance report. Get the data out of those damn tables and silly bar graphs. Stick it in a run chart, or a control chart, s’up to you. Look for any actual change over the … Continue reading
YEARS ago some clever lady told me… Avoid What If’s, these are called WIFFYs. Never allow them. If you see somebody asking “But…what if?” stop them there and then and ask “has it? do we have data that it is? … Continue reading
There was once a man who mistook his wife for a hat. This is his wife. This is a hat. He thought Why did he think that? He had a brain injury. The injury affected the way his brain processed … Continue reading
I got me some data! Done gone put it in a graph! Added meself a TRENDLINE! And me answer is THE TREND IS DOWNWARDS! This is what happens when people get data and have excel. They stick it in and press … Continue reading
Who’s the biggest out of these two guys? Is it the guy on the left? He’s barrel chested, bulky looking guy. Could be. But he’s kind of short. What about the guy on the right? He’s biggest cos he’s taller? … Continue reading
As Jay Z asserts, there is plenty wrong with performance management. And here’s 3 more! Name The reverse pantomime horse gambit What is it? An organisation decides to do something, writes down a group of words and calls it an objective/goal/priority AND THEREFORE IT … Continue reading
This is a roulette wheel. It is a machine for producing numbers between 0 and 36. Sometimes it produces a 7… Then sometimes it produces a 13… If a 7 is produced on one spin and a 13 on the … Continue reading
Remember the house that looks like Hitler? Course you do, it’s a house that looks like Hitler. What’s to forget? There’s loads of things that look like faces. There is the tampon machine that just loves checkin’ the ladies out… … Continue reading
Targets are good. They work. Comparing this quarters performance with last quarters, is good. It works Benchmarking performance against a group of other organisations, is good. That works too. Calm down! Let’s go back a bit…. Q: What’s the first … Continue reading
Let me take you back to an experiment that took place in 1930s New York….. No matter how many times a child was presented to a doctor, there was a 50% chance that they would be prescibed a tonsilectomy…even if … Continue reading
We all know that Big Data is cack. “So if you don’t like Big Data, what’s your alternative then?”, I hear nobody cry. There’s all sorts of data, here’s some definitions I just made up. Definitions Big Data: Data and … Continue reading
If you’ve know anything about systems thinking and that, you know it’s chock full of counter intuitive truths. Here are some truths about one aspect of it all: when you “eyeball data” by looking at it in a table, graph … Continue reading
Hello Peter! Hello Jane! Do you know where the data is? Let’s go for look for it! Books! That’s a good idea! But not there Jane. Try again! Not in there! Not down there either! Where could it be? Is … Continue reading
There’s no such thing as alchemy. Despite that, I have been disappointing senior managers for years by failing to produce gold out of dross. Alchemy is still believed in, at the highest levels of organisations. There are senior managers who believe that the … Continue reading
This man has more than the average number of legs for an Australian… ..and so does this Australian have more than the average number of legs too. How is this? There are a very few Australians with no legs, few Australians … Continue reading
What would give you extra prowess in the meeting room? More bang for your buck? Data! But not just any data, made-up data. This is my secret. The best data is made-up. Pretend! Nobody ever has real data, not to … Continue reading
The last post was about there being “no true value” of a measure, unless you define what you mean to measure, and that the way to know what you are supposed to be measuring is to define measure by purpose. … Continue reading
The nice lady at work who is in charge of GIS (Geographical Information Mapping) was showing me a very clever piece of software that showed in 3D the borough with each ward’s height relative to an indicator like % of … Continue reading
The following are all real answers given in organisations in answer to the question: “How will we achieve our targets?” “Improvements in service delivery focussing on services which really matter to customers” “Ongoing training and evaluation of training needs. Increase … Continue reading
What is more dangerous than this gun? The air you breathe and Ross Kemp.