Tag Archives: all wrong

I am totally negative

I am relentlessly negative about all of the following -Targets -Plans -Best practice -Benchmarking -Strategic awaydays -Strategic plans -Strategic anythings -Performance appraisals -Service Standards -Scrums (outside of a rugby game) -Trendlines -Assessments for access to services -Policies -Target operating models … Continue reading

Posted in all wrong, command and control | Tagged | 1 Comment

Three Reasons Why National Customer Service Week Is Rubbish! Again!

Balloons! Oh Christ no…..that means it’s National Customer Service Week! Again! As this mistake is repeated every year, I’ve decided to start repeating the exact same blog post I first did two years ago. So, here again is Three Reasons Why … Continue reading

Posted in all wrong, customer, systems thinking | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments

7 ways to do the Vanguard Method all wrong

Read this first. It was very popular and there’s marbles in it. If you’re too lazy here’s a summary: I went to the executive leadership team, I talked to them about something that started with studying demand and eventually led to huge … Continue reading

Posted in me doing it, systems thinking, vanguard method | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Mordecai and Rigby clear up a few common misconceptions

Performance Management doesn’t manage performance. Distance from the work doesn’t provide senior leaders with a strategic view. Distance provides distance. Signing off reports does not ensure quality. It ensures they are slightly worse. Not doing the right thing because “we’ve … Continue reading

Posted in command and control, systems thinking, systemz comix, thinking | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

How to spot a performance management

I work in performance in the public sector. I believe in my line of work. I think helping people learn how to understand work using data is useful and important. But I don’t think that everything that happens in my … Continue reading

Posted in command and control, communication, leadership, plausible but untrue, systems thinking | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Saving the world through typing

As you read this lots of keen, dedicated young men and women are improving the world through typing. They think it will. If they didn’t, typing as a job would be silly wouldn’t it? The job of “typist” disappeared along … Continue reading

Posted in plans, systems thinking | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Litmus test

Here is a litmus test. Read this link from Bloomberg Businessweek.  What do you think when you read: “I wanted a happy culture. So I fired all the unhappy people.”  “If you want an innovative team, you simply can’t include victims. Fire … Continue reading

Posted in leadership, systems thinking, very short posts | Tagged , | 2 Comments

2 minute hate

“I am a born leader. I lead by example, being quick to make decisions. It’s all about solutions, it’s not about problems” This is Jade Nash. You know her, she might sit opposite you. She might be your boss. Heaven … Continue reading

Posted in command and control, leadership, psychology | Tagged , | 3 Comments

Stick around, you might learn something

Look at your desk. Go on. Now look at the photo. Do they look similar? If so, congratulations! You are LEAN! This photo tells the infamous story of how the DWP approached improving its service by putting tape on staff … Continue reading

Posted in command and control | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

A tawdry end

As you are no doubt aware, I had a gas leak. I complained about it, and there was a to-do over whether some boxes were ticked, or whether gas leaked out of a pipe. Both can’t be true, obviously. It … Continue reading

Posted in clarity of purpose, command and control, customer, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Desk muppet

“It’s time to play the music It’s time to light the lights” Ever since I found out about systems thinking the world of conventional work, any work, has seemed more and more surreal. “It’s time to meet the Muppets on … Continue reading

Posted in all wrong, human brains are weird, plausible but untrue, systems thinking, Uncategorized, very short posts | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

How to communicate with your customers

From this brilliant article in the Guardian, asking the people who set prices why certain things are so expensive. Below is an extract from the section on why train tickets are so expensive and difficult to understand for customers. GW … Continue reading

Posted in communication, Uncategorized | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Thinkpurpose of chocolate

It’s 5 days after Easter and the local supermarket has piles of reduced price chocolate Easter eggs by the checkouts. The egg above is a premium brand of milk chocolate, organic and contains a luxurious 37% cocoa solids, high for … Continue reading

Posted in all wrong, clarity of purpose, human brains are weird, psychology, systems thinking, Uncategorized | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Five things to feed a hungry filing cabinet

There’s nothing sadder than an empty filing cabinet.  Eliminate the hunger of YOUR filing cabinets by feeding them this nutritious diet of paper-based work substitutes. 1:  An appraisal form. Typed up. This will lead to a very different approach to managing … Continue reading

Posted in all wrong, human brains are weird, plausible but untrue, setting a numerical target is like..., Uncategorized | Tagged , | Leave a comment

7 reasons you shouldn’t touch systems thinking

It’s not all cream cakes and beer in systems thinking.  Here’s seven things you’ll have to put up with if you start getting curious and learning. You’ll still work in command-and-control land. Everything around you won’t have changed but you … Continue reading

Posted in command and control, systems thinking, Uncategorized | Tagged , , | 27 Comments

Who’s trained the system?

A colleague is leaving and is clearing their desk and cupboards of decades of training manuals, never used, as the training was never used. It is like unearthing the last few decades of training fads that have plagued the public sector. … Continue reading

Posted in all wrong, deming, knowledge, plausible but untrue, systems thinking, Uncategorized, vanguard method | Tagged , , , | 6 Comments

What not to do

First act. Find data to justify yourself. Move onto something else. Repeat. – Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Posted in all wrong, very short posts | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

80% of BPR projects fail

70% to 80% of BPI/BPR projects fail, the same as the % of projects in general that fail. There is also the well known 98% of companies that don’t see anticipated results from their lean programme  There is an excellent article … Continue reading

Posted in experiment, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

things i used to believe in and no longer do-ISO9001

ISO9001! God, what was i thinking? I was a qualifed lead auditor, and i loved it. I know, really. Sadly, here are the reasons I loved ISO9001 The manuals. There are so many manuals. You have your Quality Manual, the ISO9001 … Continue reading

Posted in all wrong | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments