Ever feel sick when a “leader” in an organisation claims they are proud of the organisations achievements? Read squiretothegiants post, click for it here
I get the same irritation, and never really thought about why. But of course, it is the patronising assumption that they’re somehow in a position of superiority to be proud at all.
I can see that parents, coaches of teams, teachers of classes etc can be proud of their children, teams, classes achievements. They have a direct and one to one relationship that has influenced the success of their progeny. They have a RIGHT to feel proud. Whatever achievement is because of the two working together. The child/team/class achieves, but they do it WITH the parent/coach/teacher etc it is just that the parent etc is the absent partner whilst the achievement happens. They aren’t on the pitch, or in the examination hall, but they helped them when they were there.
That’s a nice thing. You can feel proud FOR someone who you’ve helped, but the “leaders” announcement of pride is sickening. You can feel pride if you have helped.
Just being higher up the hierarchy is NOT THE SAME THING.
The Oxford Dictionary defines the meaning of the word ‘proud’ as:
“Feeling deep pleasure or satisfaction as a result of one’s own achievements, qualities, or possessions or those of someone with whom one is closely associated”
i.e. If you are ‘proud’, it is essentially about yourself, even if it is about the actions of others that is making you feel proud.
What compelled me to look up this definition?
…because I find myself with feelings of (almost sub-conscious) irritation when I hear or read about leaders feeling ‘proud’ about what ‘their people’ have achieved (essentially for them) and I wanted to understand why I should feel this way…it was bugging me.
It seems obvious now that I have studied the dictionary definition. For someone who isn’t, say, your parent to say “I am proud of you” is condescending. It suggests superiority.
It happens to be a phrase used…
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