One of these is unnecessary

20130417-064336.jpg The one on the left is an ice-cream Battenburg cake. The one on the right is an actual Battenburg cake. They both have pink and yellow bits, and are encased in sponge.

Surely one of them is unnecessary, can you tell which?*

Here’s why you are looking at them… Another Policy Officer said of a new initiative recently:

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Do you want 10 things that look like Battenburg cake, or 1 thing that IS Battenburg cake?

If you can’t tell the difference between what is ACTUAL Battenburg, and what is PSEUDO Battenburg, then you’ll keep on trying more and more of any type of Battenburg, till you’re knee deep in Battenburg, sick on Battenburg, you have Battenburg fatigue.

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Yes. Battenburg.

What then?

Then nobody wants Battenburg.

Even if you appear with a chocolate éclair, they’ll take one look, shrug and tell you to take that Battenburg away.

Everything new, that’s Battenburg, every new initiative or change programme, Battenburg.

The worst thing you can do in this situation is appear with anything special at all, as all anybody will see is Battenburg and they will feel pre-sick at the anticipation of that sweet almondy paste crumbling on the tongue. Again.

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Erm…Battenburg?

This is of course a metaphor.

I think I’ve just about started to learn that you don’t appear as the Battenburg salesman. Just let it be known that if people need something sweet and almondy, you can sort them out.

*I however, love Battenburg, as long as it is almondy and sweet with an almost crunchy sugary sweetness. I prefer it in one go. One whole bar of it, and about 3 mugs of tea. Just under 1,000 calories of Battenburg goodness.

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